Haunting
by gaymariarobotnik
Summary: The only real thing keeping you from reaching your full potential is self doubt :) just a shorter thing, but something nonetheless


There was someone in his room.

"Ardbert?"

But as he turned on his heel, the warrior of darkness found it the exact opposite of welcome company, his guard immediately shooting up in defense at the sight of the ascian.

"Quite popular, are we? And here I thought it was only the Exarch and I who frequented your quarters." His golden eyes shone with intrigue, watching the hero collect himself, though he could sense the unease in him from malms away, and so he further pushed him, taking up the little note on the table which had been neatly tucked under a basket.

"Though honestly, at least I can admit to it. Look at this pathetic drivel. He may as well have writ a heart next to it with how mush it is."

"What do you want, Emet-Selch?" A'tali did his best to bite back any tense words, though his tail was no dishonest display, slowly and cautiously swaying back and forth as he watched the ascian's every move. If he'd visited before, why show himself now?

"Oh don't be so guarded, I merely came to talk. Spending time alone becomes dreadfully boring after awhile." Politely as one of his nature could, the ascian set the now opened letter back down, standing himself from his chair and crossing the room, much to the warrior's discomfort. He didn't exactly hate the other, but with the stress of everything else on his shoulders, he certainly didn't welcome his company right now. And yet, despite his unwelcome presence, A'tali couldn't help but bend an ear in case some sort of story were to spill from him as it had in past cases. He didn't know what it was, but he almost wanted to believe them.

"Well, talk then. Mayhap you could _actually _finish one of your tales this time around without being quite so cryptic about it." He huffed, tail flickering slightly as he crossed the room the other way, casually picking one of the sandwich corners from the well-laid basket and situating himself against the mini kitchen's counter. The ascian watched him do this, observative eyes flickering between the note, the basket, and then him. _Curious._

"On the contrary, I believe I would ask _you_ a thing or two."

The warrior's ear flickered in question, pausing mid-bite on his food and instead turning to the other with a brow cocked in question.

"What's there to know? Can't you ask your other ascian friends about me? I'm sure they'll have much to tell you." Was it wrong to give the other a little cheek? It did happen to slip whenever he was tired, doubly so around unwelcome guests.

As he expected, he earned a scoff from the other, watching the jewel on his earring daintily swing back and forth with the shake of his head.

"Tis not about you that I would prod, but about what you know. What goes on in that odd mind of yours." A pause, eyes flicking now to the small outline of a tattoo poking out from the warrior's sleeveless shirt.

"For instance, what you know of the Exarch."

"About the Exarch? No more than you, I'd wager." He simply shrugged, though something bothered him in the way that he spoke it. _Was he supposed to know something about the Exarch?_ He had kept to himself quite a bit but there was that bit of him that always seemed to want to tell him more.

"He commands the Crystal Tower as well as the Crystarium, with a kind rule. He appears to be unaging. He has a multitude of knowledge, despite appearing so young...and he seems to harbor a small sense for mischief. Spectacular at using magicks, though he says he owes it mostly to the tower. Truly that's all I could tell you." He took a bite then, uninterested in answering any further questions.

"And this Crystal Tower, it hails from the Source, does it not? I hear you were the one to traverse it and take down its unsightly ruler." The ascian spoke it like he knew of his tales, so why was there any question to it? Clearly, he was prodding for something. Something the warrior knew not what.

"If you've a point in all of this, gladly make it." The warrior sighed, quite frankly growing tired of his annoying habit of dancing around the point. He watched Emet-Selch simply shrug, the look in his eyes as unaffected as if he'd just plainly stated hello to the other.

"I just believe it to be odd that the Exarch was able to pull it from a point in time where it lacked a proper ruler. You would know if it were missing in your time, and the only other moment would be of the future. Yet, it would seem at that time there was only a singular candidate worthy of controlling the tower. Strange then, that the Exarch would know of Xande, but not of him."

It was as if he'd finally gotten to what he'd been waiting to say this entire time, driving that wooden stake of annoyance into A'tali's chest. He set his food down politely however, wanting to be the bigger person as he simply waved the small accusation off.

"It could have always been in the far future, there was always the possibility of another ruler."

"But you don't truly believe that, do you?" It was spoken flatly, and further pressed that stake into the warrior's chest. For the ascian to be so calm about this, to watch the warrior shrink under his gaze, his aura to burn bright with doubt, it unnerved him.

"Why is that, I wonder? Unless- Oh!" His gasp was dramatic, overplayed. Fake.

"Unless you knew the final holder. _Cared about him. Watched as he sealed himself away~"_

The warrior's ears lowered in shame, his huffy comebacks fading as Emet-Selch's teasing accusations slid down his spine like a cold chill, ringing and reminding him of his doubts he'd tried so hard to bury under everything else. _There was no way. It wasn't possible._

"My feelings are irrelevant on the matter. If the Crystal Exarch were to know me, he'd tell me. He has no reason to lie to me about such a thing."

"That's truly what you think then? You'll sit and wallow in doubt and naivety despite the fact that you can't displace his scent? His voice? All because you believe you don't deserve things to go your way for once?" A sigh, as he looked the warrior up and down, noting his avoidant gaze, his clenched fist shaking as if he were near hitting something. _He knew what the ascian was saying was true, but he'd never admit it._

"...even if what I believe is true...there's no way fate could ever gift me with something like that. If I see him again, I'm just going to lose him, because that is _exactly_ how things play out for me." There was a catch in his voice at his last words, and he could feel the stinging sensation in his eyes of prickling tears. _Not now dammit. Not when he was in the presence of the other._

"So I would rather never know. Then...mayhap that would keep him safe."

He wouldn't dare meet the ascian's gaze now, for his eyes would be near glistening with kept in tears. Though all he could hear was that disappointed sigh, the small jingle of that earring as he shook his head.

"Then I suppose there's no arguing with you. You're truly hopeless in terms of seeing the truth. What am I ever to do with you if you can't even see what's right in front of you~?" He spoke it like a childish hum, as he approached the doors of his room, his gloved hands gently flattening themselves against the polished wood.

"Then again, I suppose there's always time to break you out of that shell of yours. Let's hope you don't waste too much of mine." He knew A'tali wouldn't meet his gaze, but still he turned to look back at him.

"I implore you to think on this. It might prove important sometime in the future."

And with that, he was gone.

And then, he was truly alone.


End file.
